The Newspaper of Wayfarer's House
January, 1999 Issue  /  Esther Smith, Editor

Happy December birthdays to Pat, Carl and Marsha! Happy January birthdays to Patty, Tra'Von, Jordan and Mary Lou!

Welcome to Pat, Shirley, Mary Lou and Anna. Farewells and good wishes to Pauline, Terri and Sharon.

VISITORS
Along with the many groups who visited Wayfarers' with Christmas meals, gifts and other treats were two former staff volunteers: Maren Michaelis and Penny Noel. Maren, a young woman who has just received a divinity degree from the Lutheran seminary in Marburg, Germany, and who, with another recent graduate, was on her way to Central America, served at both Clairvaux Farm and Wayfarers' House. Both women plan to return to their native Germany and seek posts in the parish ministry.

Penny Noel, a volunteer at Clairvaux Farm for several month, stopped to visit en route to Spain, where she will be vacationing for a few weeks.

PUPPET SHOWS
The winter puppet show season began on Jan. 5 with the Wayfarers' group presenting a show at the Roman Catholic Day Care for the Elderly. We will report on their performances as they take place in the community. At the House, we see puppets, stage, and other materials being readied.

RELAPSE -- MORE RED FLAGS
Sharon Gatelein-Parker attended a free lecture at Ashley's Recovery Center in Aberdeen, Md., on Dec. 17. The lecture was open to the public, and Sharon has submitted her lecture notes from the address by Micki Thomas to UPS AND DOWNS.

The 3 Steps of the Relapse Process (in the recovery from addictions):
1. Starts as an unconscious thought
2. Turns into a conscious thought -- a plan emerges
3. Turns into a conscious action

What is a SLIP?
Sobriety Loses its Priority
Sobriety needs to be #1 for a long time -- not forever, but still a long time

Confusion and Overreaction
1. Difficulty in thinking clearly
2. Difficulty in managing feelings and emotions
3. Difficulty remembering things
4. Periods of confusion
5. Difficulty in managing stress
6. Irritation with friends & family
7. Easily angered
8. Starting fights
9. Defensiveness
10. Impulsive & compulsive behaviors

Depression
1. Dropping out of classes or meetings
2. Irregular eating habits
3. Lack of desire to take action
4. Difficulty sleeping restfully
5. Loss of daily structure

Relapse
1. Starting to relapse
2. Attempting to control it
3. Feeling disappointed
4. Loss of control
5. Life and health problems

Obstacles to recovery
H -- hungry for spirituality, love, acceptance
A -- angry, anxious, hurt
L -- lonely
T -- tired

What do relapsers need most?
1. Large doses of self-esteem
2. Large doses of confidence
3. Large doses of respect

H -- honesty (if not now, when?)
O -- open-mindedness
W -- willingness (if not you, who?)
This was the last lecture in a series. Sharon hopes to attend the full series when it is offered again.

FOOD NEEDED
According to an Associated Press article published in the Cecil Whig (Dec. 16, 1998), "more people are relying on Maryland's soup kitchens, homeless shelters and food pantries as welfare rolls continue to drop," as shown in a study released in mid-December by the Center for Poverty Solutions. The study showed 23 percent more people needed help getting shelter and food in 1998 and concluded that families dropped from welfare rolls by the new federal regulations needed help to feed themselves and their children.

There were 191 emergency providers statewide contributing to the study, which found 26 percent more senior citizens used food pantries. A spokesperson for the center said poor families had not benefitted from the state's healthy economy.

DURING THE CHRISTMAS HOLIDAY
by Mandy
Over the Christmas holiday vacation I really enjoyed myself. I went up to Rehoboth Beach where my brother lives and had one of the best times of my life. We went out every night and had so much fun. The thing that I enjoyed most was being able to see the snow on the beach, which I've always wanted to see. I remember going bowling with my brother Eric, his girl friend and my nephew. One of the most embarrassing things happened. I was going to bowl, and my brother scared me. The ball went flying backwards, and I slipped, and everyone started laughing at me. I was a mess. One other time was when my brother and I were singing, walking down the mall, and everyone in the mall was looking at us like we were crazy. It was so cool. He and I both have the same taste, especially when it comes to food, but one thing I learned was never to let him pick your clothes out. He has no taste when it comes to a girl's clothes, but I really enjoyed myself, and I love him.